My approach to therapy has grown from my 20 years working in the field. I work from a mindfulness-based, open, and compassion focused perspective. When working with couples and families, I practice within the framework of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). This is a technique grounded in the area of Attachment Science - an over 50-year body of research that guides us in helping couples to deepen intimacy through this short term model of therapy. EFT focuses heavily on the rebuilding trust and emotional security in the relationship through experiential work in session. EFT is a modality that requires a therapist who is objective, empathic and focused on process over “story”. My priority is to establish emotional safety with the couple and with each other to identify their relationship dynamic, deepen their ability to engage with feelings and regain a meaningful bond. Clients who have successfully completed treatment are able to identify and be aware of when their negative communication cycle begins to dominate. They use vulnerability and trust to move toward each other, instead of withdrawing or shutting down. Conflicts may still arise, but are instead met with bids for connection and genuine and skillful attempts toward repair.
Grief
My approach to working with someone in acute or prolonged grief varies based on an individuals goals and needs, but is always guided by a humanistic, relational, and mindfulness based perspective for healing. We may explore dialectical thinking and mindfulness based practices which support processing of deep, emotional experiences while working with the tension between acceptance and change. A healthy grieving process allows for a multitude a feelings to be present and an ability to integrate the loss into one’s life, rather than forcing the idea that you must “get over it” before you can live again. I see healing from grief as a process of adapting to a new life and actively being with the experience, rather than denying or pushing anything away. When grief becomes complicated and disabling, we may discuss using exposure based work to help reduce avoidance and reengage with life with meaning and purpose again.
Trauma Recovery
In cases where unrelenting trauma symptoms are present, trauma work becomes the focus of our sessions. Trauma work is a type of therapy that helps a person recover after overwhelming or frightening experiences that overwhelm a person’s ability to function and cope properly in essential aspects of life. Symptoms can originate from developmental trauma that is repeated throughout formative years in one’s life or single event. When something traumatic happens, the brain sometimes gets "stuck" in survival mode. Even when the danger is over, the brain may continue to react as though it isn't. Trauma therapy helps the brain recognize that the event is in the past so the person can respond to the present instead of constantly reacting to old danger. I use the protocol for Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT), an evidenced- based treatment which helps clients heal from PTSD symptoms through a short-term treatment model.
CPT is one of the most researched treatments for post-traumatic stress. It focuses on how a traumatic event changed the way someone thinks about themselves, other people, and the world. After trauma, people often develop beliefs like: "It was my fault, "I can't trust anyone”, or “the world is never safe”. These beliefs can make the emotional pain continue long after the traumatic event has ended. CPT is about helping one separate what happened from the meanings they came to believe about themselves because it happened.
CPT is different from simply "talking about it". Many people think trauma therapy means repeatedly telling the story of the trauma. CPT is less about retelling every detail and more about understanding and changing the beliefs that developed afterward. This approach helps survivors allow trauma to become part of their history instead of something that continues to define their present life.
“Just as a snake sheds it’s skin, we must shed our past over and over again.”
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